5 Stupid Things I've Done Since Wednesday, Which Kind of Sum Me Up:
1. Worn my v-neck shirt backwards until two in the afternoon, when I looked in the mirror, observed the unusually high neckline, then twisted around to see a triangle of spine cleavage.
2. Walked into a drinking fountain, then stared in shock as a jet of water sprayed my stomach. Considered how to "get the stain out," pondered simply using soap and water, and then thought...oh. Right. Duh.
3. Washed my hair with bubble bath. Was surprised at the foaminess.
4. Watched the presidential debates sober; listened to smug rich republican kid blabber on about economic policy, protesting only when he attempted to single out my energy drink as a symbol of the merits of consumerism.
5. Admitted these things.
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